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I’m a Special Snowflake!

September 24, 2013

My computer ate my entire photo library a few weeks ago. I do not know how this happened. One time I used my computer and it was there; the next time, iPhoto asked me, “What photo library do you want to use?” ignoring my spittle-accompanied screams of, “The one I painstakingly uploaded from YEARS of pointing and shooting with my iPhone, you recalcitrant cum-dumpster!”

After searching the hard drive for hours with the digital equivalent of a fine-toothed comb for evidence of my missing pictures, I came away with nothing more than a hard-to-quell urge to toss my computer off the top of the CenturyLink building, not just because it’s the tallest building in Denver but also because I’m sure the disappeared photos were somehow the internet provider’s fault, and I could then find a really weasely lawyer to get them to pay for a new computer.

But I realized that wasn’t going to do much to get my pictures back, so I swallowed my pride and took the computer in to the resident experts at my local Apple Store, who ran test after test on the hard drive, looked in all the same places I had, and turned to me with a sheepish, “We have no idea what happened. This is the first time in our combined decades of working here that we’ve ever seen something like this.”

As I gawked in slack-jawed despair, one of the techs helpfully said, “We could back up all the files and do a memory restore, but it’d be like amputating an arm to fix a paper cut.”

So my pictures were gone, but I was able to handle that with a measure of stoicism, seeing as how most of the really good ones are scattered somewhere in the great scrapbook that is social media. Never mind boring the guests you’ve invited over for a few drinks with your latest collection of vacation photos; now you can bore your best frenemy from third grade as well!

This event did cause me to panic about the 3,459 music files I have saved on iTunes, however. Seeing as how most of those files weren’t downloaded through iTunes, replacing those would be a matter of painstakingly re-importing every CD in my collection, some of which have doubtlessly escaped during moves and break-ups. Some were borrowed rather than bought, with me whistling guiltily and looking around for Mr. Smith-esque dudes from the RIAA scowling in the shadows as I responded to iTunes’ innocent query, “Would you like to import [album] into your iTunes collection?” by clicking on the helpfully highlighted “Yes” button.

And this I would never be able to bear stoically. The pictures I can, honestly, take or leave. But I love having music on. I always have my headphones on when walking or taking public transit for reasons extended beyond projecting an aura of aloof bitchiness, and I actually look forward to long drives to and from the mountains because I’ll finally have a chance to listen to some of the longer albums in my collection in one sitting, like they’re meant to be listened to.

So I promptly backed up my collection to my external hard drive. But no sooner had the file copying completed than I felt another sense of unease. What if something happened to my hard drive? Physical objects had a nasty tendency to go missing or get damaged.

Which is why I’m now backing up all my music to Google Drive. This takes up much of my bandwidth, so much that I’m having difficulty loading pages that require more than basic HTML (which is all of ’em on the modern World Wide Web!). All of which to serve as a very wordy apology/explanation for the fact that my posts will probably be shorter and less frequent until the last song finally copies itself to the ether, forever accessible barring some kind of zombie apocalypse or computer uprising, in either of which case I’ve got bigger things to worry about than not being able to hear Quadrophenia or Born to Run for the million hillion bajillionth (or dare I say, googol-th?) time.

Unless the very difficulties I’ve been having are the signs that it’s beginning. In which case, let this be my last will and testament: whoever hacks all my passwords and finally accesses my Google Drive account in the distant future, know that I have absolutely no idea how “American Pie” wound up in my collection.


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  1. My iTunes went corrupt a few months ago, due to a problem with the new software upgrade. I was lucky to have most of it saved in an extra folder, but I had to try and piece together the rest, which is impossible to really do. I got an external hard drive after that. Such a mess. I was so mad.

    • I would be furious. Losing my music is so beyond unfathomable for me that even trying to imagine it results in a giant blank space that I imagine would be filled with rage. Thankfully, Google Drive finally uploaded all those files, so between that and the external hard drive, I should be safe *knocks on wood*!

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